Blog: Don't bite your tongue


Do you have life lessons you feel forced to learn over and over again? And do you wonder if you'll ever get it right?

I seem to have a few.

Here's one: Speaking up and advocating for myself.

Less than a week ago I plopped myself down in the hairdresser's chair for a wee trim. And made my often fatal error of not speaking up and asking for what I want.

A funny thing happens when you don't ask for what you want - you don't get what you want.

I walked out of the salon sure I was a spot-on body double for Jim Carrey and his ill-fated bangs in "Dumb and Dumber."

Oh well. It's hair. It grows.

But that's not the point. I've been beating myself up for the past few days for simply not speaking up. Why is it often so hard for me, and maybe you, to do that? Open mouth, say words, close mouth. 

It can be so fraught, though. I worry the other person won't like me or will be offended.

How often do we hope the people around us know exactly what it is we want? And isn't that ridiculous. Do we know what other people want? Maybe sometimes but it's always better to hear some clarification, isn't it?

I posed this idea to my yoga class the other night and had us do some woodchoppers to both find our voice and use it. Loudly.

This is also an excellent way to energize yourself if you're going through a low slump in your day.


Stand up with feet spread wide. Let your feet come off your yoga mat. Point your toes out.

Reach your arms up overhead and interlace your fingers except for the index fingers. Bring them together and point them up.

Take a big breath in as you lengthen the arms up and exhale as you fold forward sweeping your arms toward the earth. Let the arms fall between your legs. Soften your knees a bit as you fold forward.

The most important part: As you exhale and fold forward, make a loud "Ha!" sound.

Repeat a handful of times. We did five repetitions the other night.

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