Save this content for laterSave this content on your device for later, even while offline Sign in with FacebookSign in with your Facebook account Close

IT’S SO HOT ...’ — OLD (AND ODD) SAYINGS FLY AS TEMPERATURE RISES

By: NYT News Services
July 21, 2005
0
RALEIGH, N.C. — Perhaps, as you stumbled in the house, clammy and damp, you said, “Man, it’s hot,” for what seems like the hundredth time. We know we have and we’re tired of repeating ourselves.
We figured if our bodies can’t be fresh, at least our words can be. Until the heat peaks in August, try out a hot phrase. They won’t make the temperature drop, but they might make you smile. And that’s pretty cool. It’s so hot the birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground. It’s hotter than a half-bred fox in a forest fire. It’s hotter than two bears fighting in a forest fire. It’s hotter than a billy goat in a pepper patch. It’s hotter than two cats fighting in a wool sock. It’s so hot that I tied my mule in a field of corn, and the corn started popping and the mule thought it was snow and froze to death! It’s so hot I saw two trees fighting over a dog. It was so hot today I saw a dog chasing a cat and they were both walking. It’s hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk. It’s so hot outside that you could fry an egg on the hood of my car. It’s hotter than a depot stove. It’s hot as love in August. It’s hotter than a mother-in-law’s kiss. It’s so hot I just saw the devil dancing buck-naked in the middle of the driveway. It’s hotter than a firecracker lit at both ends. It’s hotter than a $2 pistol on the Fourth of July. It’s hotter than a June bride in a feather bed. It’s hotter than Georgia asphalt. It’s hotter than high noon in Death Valley. It’s Africa hot! It’s hotter than blue blazes! (See note below.) It’s hotter than a hoot’n poot! (We don’t know what that means, either.) It’s so hot the Popsicle timeframe is down to 20 seconds. It’s hotter than a steel playground at noon. It’s so hot that the trees are creeping around looking for shade. It’s so hot around the barn that the barnyard pimp won’t even come out and check on his little chicks. It’s hotter than a hen laying eggs. It’s so hot outside it will make you return things you never stole. It’s so hot I could spit fire. It’s stupid hot! It is hot enough to cure tobacco. It’s hotter than Paris Hilton’s underpants. It’s hotter than the devil’s underwear. It’s hotter than a pair of sweat pants full of barbecue. It’s another one of those aluminum foil sweater days. It’s hotter than the hinges of Hades. It’s hotter than a ginger mill in Hades. It’s hotter than seven hells out there. It’s hotter than the four sides of hell. It’s so hot that it makes me want to take off my skin and sit in my bones. I hope you brought the champagne glasses because it is TOASTY out. And the old standard: It’s not the heat, it’s the humidity.
Comment Policy
Register to the Colorado Springs Gazette
Incognito Mode Your browser is in Incognito mode

You vanished!

We welcome you to read all of our stories by signing into your account. If you don't have a subscription, please subscribe today for daily award winning journalism.

Register to the Colorado Springs Gazette
Register to the Colorado Springs Gazette
Subscribe to the Colorado Springs Gazette

It appears that you value local journalism. Thank you.

Subscribe today for unlimited digital access with 50% fewer ads for a faster browsing experience.

Already a Subscriber? LOGIN HERE

Subscribe to the Colorado Springs Gazette

It appears that you value local journalism. Thank you.

Subscribe today for unlimited digital access with 50% fewer ads for a faster browsing experience.

Subscribe to the Colorado Springs Gazette

Some news is free.
Exceptional journalism takes time, effort and your support.

Already a Subscriber? LOGIN HERE

articles remaining
×
Thank you for your interest in local journalism.
Gain unlimited access, 50% fewer ads and a faster browsing experience.