Trying to create a game plan for this 4/20 weekend in Denver is maddening enough to make your brain feel like the end of a just extinguished Hemp Wick.

The Denver metro area is being invaded by bong-friendly bands and edible-eating event planners who all want your duckets. There are more shows on Sunday night than you can shake a Thai stick at, with festivities kicking off as early as Wednesday. All of a sudden, 4/20 has turned into your annoying friend who insists it’s her “birthday week.”

Want to make the most out of your marijuana weekend? Here’s my schedule of events that any stoner can pull off, provided you have a sober driver and a modicum of motivation:

Wednesday, April 16

- City Hall is one of my favorite venues, as it looks like a level from “GoldenEye” for Nintendo 64. When they have laser light shows I get nervous. Fortunately, the soothing sounds of West Coast rapper Too $hort will be present to chill me out at the Big Industry Show Afterparty.

Thursday, April 17

- While Sexpot Comedy may sponsor my podcast (disclaimer), we receive no financial remuneration from the guys. I’m not even sure what the word sponsor means, apparently. They are throwing the highlight of Thursday, however, at the venerable Oriental Theatre. For its size, the space has a very DIY feel/smell to it, as patrons aren’t leaving the ganja at the door. Headlining their monthly show is Andy Haynes, fresh off his appearance at the High Plains Comedy Festival.